Death by Carrot

Death by Carrot
PART 1

The victim, Michael Downess, was found at 3:24AM. He was declared dead on arrival.

Violence has been on the rise ever since I took over for Captain Mast. There hadn’t been any murders, only assaults. Until tonight. The only pattern my unit has been able to uncover between them is that there isn’t one. Some of the victims knew each other, some not. No one can remember the assailant nor the weapon used against them.

Downess’s murder was too much. Assault I can deal with, play it off as an opportunity to stress police presence and recruit cadets. And it’d be easier if the press wasn’t slowly turning against me.

They seemed understanding at first, “New Captain Must Assuage New Assaults”, but now they’re less sympathetic: “More Attacks, Less Answers.” The first line of that story said ‘Captain Ricky has a lot of ‘splainin to do.’ It’s easy to be cute when the town isn’t crying out for your resignation.

“Captain!” Lieutenant Carroway approaches me in front of the Channel Seven news bus. “Captain, we’ve confirmed there are six stab wounds along the chest and abdomen of the victim.”

Molly Lancaster the field reporter clips on her microphone and beckons over her cameraman. “Six stab wounds!” She’s talking to Carroway, knowing I wouldn’t have let that slip without consideration. Carroway gives me an apologetic look but then nods confirmation. “A stabbing,” Molly tells the camera. “There hasn’t been a murder in Pico Ranch in almost ten years. Terrible. Terrible! Captain Richards, is there any lead on who might have committed this heinous crime? This time, I mean.” A clear edge of derision in that last bit.

I make sure to look Molly in the eye so the camera gets nothing but a shadowy profile from me. “All suspects in the case are being kept confidential for the protection of Mr. Downess’s friends and family.”

Molly is disappointed as ever but won’t show it to the camera. “Well, can you at least confirm the weapon for us?”

I look at Carroway, wondering the same thing myself. “Umm,” Carroway says. He’s nervous and unsure if he should speak. I nod my permission, reminding myself that Molly’s audience are the people we serve. “The victim’s body was taken an hour ago to the hospital for a biopsy. All we’re certain of at this point is that the weapon appears to have been conical in shape and not left behind.”

Molly nods. “Another mystery for Captain Richards to solve.”

Carroway’s walkie hisses and I lead him away. “We’ll keep you updated,” I tell Molly. We head to my cruiser.

It’s the morgue on the walkie. Dr. Hanley sounds tired. I wouldn’t normally make requests but I feel as if there are few people I can trust lately. He reads a long list of procedures they’ve conducted and ends by stating there was an unusual amount of beta-carotene and vitamin A in the stab wounds.

Carroway pulls the walkie off his belt. “The stab wounds were in the abdomen, weren’t they?” He’s as frustrated as I am. “So he ate a salad! Our precinct has been declining for months and you’re reporting on nutrition!”

“Lieutenant Carroway,” I say, taking the walkie. “I appreciate the dedication and the enthusiasm but this unit works together.” I mash the walkie button, “Doc, are the stomach and chest wounds both filled with the nutrients?”

Some static follows. “Yes, Captain. And there appears to be some slight discoloring around the edges.”

That’s all I need to hear. One of the cadets I keep for overnight bookkeeping is on a laptop in the back of a precinct SUV. I shout across the taped-off parking lot of Downess’s apartment. “Cadet! Get on the internet and tell me what sources can leave a residue of beta-carotene and vitamin A.”

Three minutes go by in which Carroway and I debate motives. Downess was a clerk at Costco, no girlfriend but fairly social. He was a likable enough guy. The worst information we have was that got a parking ticket last week. Our brainstorming ends with no solid leads by time the cadet has hustled his laptop to me.

“Captain,” he says. He flips the monitor to face me, displaying an array of vegetables.

“Lieutenant,” I start, but he’s already got the walkie in hand.

“Dr. Hanley, what color did you say the stabs were?”

A crackle. “Orange.”

Carroway looks to me, and I confirm. “Cadet, list the murder weapon. Death by carrot.”

A car passes by and the headlights illuminate my face in the cruiser. I appear stoic, my abhorrence undetectable. How am I supposed to promote nutrition at the school assemblies now? What will I tell my daughter when I used to joke that her veggies won’t kill her, if only she’d give them a chance? It hurts to think of Michael Downess being attacked this way. By a carrot. Who would do this?

This will not become an unsolved mystery. Assaults I can handle, murder I refuse to let soil my captaincy.

I will find the murderer.